I need advise but don't know who to talk to in order to know of this is normal to feel this way or not. I feel like my husband is inferior to me.
I will start by saying that he is a unique soul. I married him because I felt,and still feel, that I will probably never be loved the way that he loves me. He is persistently affectionate and sweet. He genuinely thinks I am beautiful when I truly feel I am ugly. He hasn't ever yelled at me. We don't have typical arguments. I've never met anyone who tries so hard. We have a good friendship.
But despite those good traits, during our entire marriage I have consistently felt disappointed that he doesn't live up to the expectations and needs I have in a partner. He is dumb. He just is. And that dumbness has been grounds for repeatedly irritation. He never has any idea what's going on. He cannot think critically. He doesn't understand basic concepts. He is painfully slow at getting anything done. He doesn't understand how to function as an adult. He cant be responsible to keep track of and pay bills on time. He doesn't know how to pay his taxes or apply for a loan or really handle any of the basic business transactions an average adult needs to handle. He's completely incompetent. I have to handle every aspect of everything by myself because he either doesn't know how to do it or he simply won't do it. He is emotionally immature and that immaturity has traumatized me with his chaotic and emotionally violent behavior. It also drives me nuts and makes me hateful toward him because I hate when he act like that. It's driven me to lose custody of one of my kids and I am facing losing the other and being homeless within a month. Because of his lack of intelligence and his lack of education, he cannot support our family and that also makes me angry and resentful toward him. A husband should be able to provide comfortably for his family. He has been saying our entire relationship that he needs to finish his education but it never gets done and that's also a pattern. He procrastinates every goddamn thing that needs to be done. I just feel like he's inferior to me in every way except his looks. I feel like I do not have an equal partner and despite asking and begging and demanding over and over again, he's not capable to changing enough for me to feel like I'm not alone and am just dragging a dead weight around. I want to be taken care of and to feel like I have a partner. I never have felt that way with him.
I will start by saying that he is a unique soul. I married him because I felt,and still feel, that I will probably never be loved the way that he loves me. He is persistently affectionate and sweet. He genuinely thinks I am beautiful when I truly feel I am ugly. He hasn't ever yelled at me. We don't have typical arguments. I've never met anyone who tries so hard. We have a good friendship.
But despite those good traits, during our entire marriage I have consistently felt disappointed that he doesn't live up to the expectations and needs I have in a partner. He is dumb. He just is. And that dumbness has been grounds for repeatedly irritation. He never has any idea what's going on. He cannot think critically. He doesn't understand basic concepts. He is painfully slow at getting anything done. He doesn't understand how to function as an adult. He cant be responsible to keep track of and pay bills on time. He doesn't know how to pay his taxes or apply for a loan or really handle any of the basic business transactions an average adult needs to handle. He's completely incompetent. I have to handle every aspect of everything by myself because he either doesn't know how to do it or he simply won't do it. He is emotionally immature and that immaturity has traumatized me with his chaotic and emotionally violent behavior. It also drives me nuts and makes me hateful toward him because I hate when he act like that. It's driven me to lose custody of one of my kids and I am facing losing the other and being homeless within a month. Because of his lack of intelligence and his lack of education, he cannot support our family and that also makes me angry and resentful toward him. A husband should be able to provide comfortably for his family. He has been saying our entire relationship that he needs to finish his education but it never gets done and that's also a pattern. He procrastinates every goddamn thing that needs to be done. I just feel like he's inferior to me in every way except his looks. I feel like I do not have an equal partner and despite asking and begging and demanding over and over again, he's not capable to changing enough for me to feel like I'm not alone and am just dragging a dead weight around. I want to be taken care of and to feel like I have a partner. I never have felt that way with him.
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